What's Your Type? The Important Difference Between Your Type and Your Preference in Dating
So like...what’s your type?
Intuitively speaking, I feel like this year has been all about dating for me. With summer and cuffing season coming up, I think it’s important to really go for what we want and focus on longevity rather than a fleeting moment of passion. Sometime last year, I was listening to Relationshit with Kamie Crawford, and there was one episode that stuck out to me. It was about knowing the difference between your type and your preference.
We’ve all been asked the question, “What’s your type?” And I’m sure the answer always has something to do with your dream partner’s height, having abs, and straight white teeth. Admit it. But what I just described was something one might prefer in a potential partner, not their “type.”
It blew my mind when I learned about the difference between the two, and I have been thinking about it so much that I wanted to share it with you. So in this article, I’ll explain the difference between your type and your preference. Hopefully, this will give you better insight into your dating habits and help you get the ball rolling in your dating life.
Your Preference
When I think about “preference,” I think of being in grade school when all I wanted was that one guy with the dark brown hair and bright blue eyes. He was my first ever crush, and I only wanted him. If he didn’t want to be my boyfriend, then I’d go back and find another dark-haired, blue-eyed boy to ogle over. But there was nothing else besides him being super cute with blue eyes and dark hair. So, your preference is what you see on the outside and more than likely is 100% physical. Wanting a partner that is a certain height, from a certain background, with a certain style or body type, etc., is all about your preference. It’s mostly physical—all the things that induce those butterflies in your stomach.
Your Type
Now, your type is more about the deeper traits of the person you want to be with. Your type is more about who your dream partner is on the inside. When I think about “type,” I think about those things that give you that warm feeling deep down inside. So your type of partner could be someone God-fearing, generous with their time, responsible, reliable, family-oriented, etc. Your type is typically all the things that you do not easily see. Dare I say, finding your type is the more important one.
We often miss a chance with our type because they do not fit our preference. If it’s for religious or cultural reasons that you stay in a certain lane, then that’s okay. But for those of us that don’t, I have a task for you. Make a list of 5-10 non-negotiable traits for your type—these are traits that you most desire in a dream partner. That way, as you go through your dating journey, it’ll be a bit easier to determine who is a better match on a deeper level.